Sometimes when I can't sleep, I just think about things. Generally they are pointless things that don't actually matter, but for some reason I can't help but to think about them. I guess I'm just weird like that. Anyway, this is a compilation of the things I think about when I can't sleep. (Yes I write them down.) Some are longer than others because I think about them more often. I hope this makes you think..or laugh. I'll settle for either of those.
I apologize for starting things off on a depressing note. The worst kind of torture is not physical. Physical pain is only temporary. No, the worst kind of torture is mental. The one place you can never escape is your own mind. Think about it, if someone just sat there and dripped water on your forehead all day every day, eventually you'd go completely crazy. Seriously, I would hate that. What about if they just locked you in a pitch black circular room and told you the key was in a corner? I think mental torture is cruel and unusual punishment. I don't know..just something I thought of.
Another thing I thought of... Whoever said cheerleaders are the most talkative people in high school was not around speech kids enough. I mean, those of us who were on speech team know what I'm talking about. You're literally trained to talk for 5 or more minutes with few pauses. I mean, yeah, you gotta pause to give your audience time to digest everything but not a long enough pause for someone to be able to interject in a normal conversation. I was on speech team, and my speech friends are some of the most talkative people I know. I just don't understand how nobody has caught on to that yet. Maybe it's because speech kids are considered nerds, so nobody talks to them. I don't know.
Okay, so since this is a blog, I feel as though I should bring up blogs in general. Just the name, blog, shows how lazy us Americans are. Blog is short for weblog. American's are just too lazy to keep the extra two letters on the front of it. Is this really how lazy we've gotten? We can't say weblog? We have to shorten it to "blog" because it's easier to say? It doesn't make any sense to me. Why was it shortened? Did someone just decide we had too many two syllable words in the universe and that we needed another one syllable word? Americans are just lazy I guess. Actually, I don't guess. I know it.
So, I was thinking about the movie Dodgeball last night, and I was wondering, of all the mascots Globo Gym could have picked, why in the world would they pick a purple cobra? I mean, what's so menacing about that? Okay, cobra I get. They're creepy, gross, slithery little things, but purple? There is nothing, and I mean nothing, menacing about the color purple. I would probably laugh if I came across a purple cobra. If it was a normal brown-ish colored one, I'd probably scream and run away. Purple? No. Maybe they're trying to sound weak, so they can take their opponent by surprise. Or maybe White Goodman is just crazy. I don't really know. I just think it's funny.
Last one, I promise. Okay, so remember when you were a kid, and you did something really stupid, and there was that classic person there to be like "I'm telling everybody!" Or if you broke something it was "I'm telling mom/your mom." Now, if you were in the same situation, kids would say "I'm putting that on facebook." I just find that really funny. Everything now is about phones, the internet, or something made by Apple. Back in the day we didn't have those luxuries. (I used to make fun of people who said that. Look at me now.) I don't know. (How many times have I said that now?) Technology is crazy. It is advancing obnoxiously fast. I mean, that's good and all. Another thing about technology, how come we can come up with these thin little touch screen things that do everything, but we can't come up with the cure to the common cold? Apparently it's super complicated or something. I am really bad at science, so I guess I don't really have room to talk.
Well, that's about it. I don't have anything super encouraging to add to the end of this. In fact, I'm probably going to ramble until I think of a good way to end it. Actually, I won't. I hope I made you think in some way. (Assuming someone is actually still reading this.) Hopefully I provided you with some mental stimulation. Now you don't have to read the news. Lucky you.
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